Top 10 Personality Development Tips.

1. Be Confident:

Confidence is certainly the most important factor which adds to the personality of any individual. A person’s confidence might go down due to mistakes, failure, guilty or any other thing which is undesirable. Some people often develop inferiority complex due to their physical appearance, caste, financial status etc.  Such people perceive confidence as their weakness, while the truth is that confidence is an individual’s biggest strength.

 Your confidence reflects your character, attitude and passion.  You should be confident about who you are and whatever you do. Being confident will help you to express yourself and stand amongst the crowd.

2. Improve Your Communication Skills:

 The way you speak reflects who you are. Be polite and gentle with your words. Use decent words while interacting with everyone.  Always think before you speak. English being globally accepted is preferred everywhere. So work on your English proficiency by listening to English news, reading English newspapers and magazines. Always use simple words general interactions.

3. Dress Up Well:

Dressing sense means the general sense about how you should dress up for office, party or any other occasion.  A person should therefore wear according to the situation and according to how well the attire suits him/her. Good looks no doubt will add to your personality but what matters the most is how you are dressed up. Even a 5’4 guy with a dark complexion can have a good personality if he knows how to carry himself.  Dressing sense thus plays a major role in personality and confidence development.

4. Do What You’re Passionate About and Be Passionate About What You Do:

Always follow your passion and do what interests you. This will not only help you to grow as a person but will also add to your confidence. Be passionate about your work. Make sure that you give your best in whatever you do. This will add to your growth and strengthen your self confidence. NEVER miss a chance to prove yourself.

5. Watch Your Body Language:

Body language plays an important role to judge a person’s confidence and personality.  Try to make use of positive gestures while interacting with others. This shows that you’re at ease while having a discussion. Studies reflect that 75% of our communication happens non-verbally. Your gestures thus play a vital role while interacting with others.

6. Improve Your Social Skills:

Man is a social animal. Every individual has to interact with a group of people one time or the other. Being shy or introvert is the least desirable characteristics in any individual. Always stay updated with the current affairs and what is happening in your society. Try participating in group discussions and seminars. This will help you to be more open and adjust amongst a group of individuals.

7. Develop Leadership Qualities:

A good leader is believed to have a good personality. Leadership skills do not mean how well you give orders to your subordinates. It means how well you can manage your subordinates to accomplish a particular task. Work harder to set an example to your subordinates. Express yourself and always do as you say.

8. Be Optimistic:

Have a positive outlook towards everything. Nobody wants to be around a person who is negative and complaining all the time. Nobody wants to work or live with a pessimist. When you face a failure, let go of the assumption that you’re the unluckiest person alive. Use positive statements like “I can do it”, “I always have a choice” etc. Expect good things from the future.

9. Be a Patient Listener:

Be an enthusiastic listener. Listening is a very essential part of communication. This will help you to see things from the eyes of others. Mental presence is a must to be good listener. Try to get away from any possible distraction while talking to your family members, friends and co-workers. Ask questions to let the other person know that you were listening to him/her.

10. Be a Good Learner:

Good learning skills in an individual are highly desirable. You should always have the zeal to learn new things while at work. This reflects your enthusiasm. Don’t let yourself repeat the same mistakes. Learn from them.

Here’s a famous quote by Eleanor Roosevelt: “Learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself” 

3 Ways To Hit the Delete Button On Negativity

Happy thoughts! Happy thoughts! Happy thoughts! You hear them say. Be positive bro, think positive babe…it will all work out! But how do we do it…

Like you, me too, was told just the same. So much so; that being positive seemed to be the new age mantra for being successful. I was a believer. I did just that…I sat positive, I walked positive, I talked positive. I thought positive. So much so that I was sure that my blood group B+ve was no longer just a coincidence.

And it was all hunky dory at first…I was positive and I got what I wanted. Then came a turn in my life when I set my eyes upon my dream job and as a bonus even met my dream man. As I set out singing my ‘don’t worry be happy’ song…one day; two days, ten days, 20 months rolled over into 10 years. Neither did I get my dream job nor did it work out with my dream man! Sigh! More like a nightmare. Then came the hard part…the part they don’t tell you much about.

The staying positive part!

It took many more years before I reconciled with my dreams and learned to dream big again. Today; we life coaches, therapists and individuals in similar streams of work are often expected to have it all worked out, always with it, wise, together, and evolved. Am I? Yes, I am. Mostly. And that is solely because over the years I have more resources available in my tool box of different techniques which I dig into rather than drown myself into self-sabotage. Yet, do I ALWAYS have it all worked out? Do I wake up each morning skipping with joy, smiling into the sun and singing to the birds? Not exactly; I have my days too. We all do.

These then are 3 ways which can help us along this journey of keeping the mind focused and aligned with positivity.

Activate the delete button to your brain.

When you cannot stop from thinking negative.

When you’ve been faced with too many setbacks, back to back and see the glass half-empty rather than half full….say; ‘delete’ (or erase /backspace /rewind, whatever resonates with you)… and rephrase immediately. It’s time to declare a boycott. Take a stand. Start a revolution in your head by recognizing that the thought patterns you’re living with are not welcome. Stop them. Evict them. The point being that if cannot stop yourself BEFORE thinking negative. Stop yourself after.

You may be tempted to find this silly or childish. But don’t. Do it. Trust that there is unbelievable power in this recognition and in making the decision that something is no longer okay

 I repeat the word delete in my head… until I am mentally satisfied that it’s completely trashed. Carefully and positively reframe thereafter.

Catch positivity and latch onto it.

When you find it really hard to stay positive on your own.

Seek help. Seek inspiration. You may find it in reading a collection of quotes, in a song, in a book, in a blog, poem or an article, whatever motivates you. Latch onto that one thing which gives you just enough to help you hang in there for that one more day. Some may find that solace in prayer. Some in a bit of all. The brain cannot differentiate between the imaginary and the real. If you imagine positivity; it is very likely you will find the strength to bring it back in your reality.

Reach out to a real/virtual friend

When you feel you’ve hit rock bottom.

Often times all we need in order to pick ourselves back up again is empathy. Somebody who cares to hear our story, somebody who can be that shoulder to cry on; that hand you can hold; who’ll willingly lend you their spine. Reach out to that person today. Ask for help. It is not a sign of weakness but a show of strength. And for some reason if no one in your life currently fits that bill, reach out to a stranger. Someone with a fresh perspective, who doesn't know all your baggage, who will just listen without judging. Nowadays, social media has put a new dimension to friendship and support groups – find one today. The emotional support of friendship leads to better health through positive effects on both body and mind. 

A Song For The Waves

The boat swayed with the rhythm of the waves while the boatman hummed a tune as if to pacify an angry beast. The song intrigued me, the slow cadence of his voice was melancholy one moment and optimistic the next moment. It filled the air with a strange intoxication. He sang rustic folk-songs, lyrics I could not interpret but the tunes arrested my attention.
My father, politely trying to start a conversation said “What is that song Bhaiya?”

The boatman’s face broke into a broad grin, “It is the song I sing to my children asking them to be brave.”

“How many children do you have? Where do they live?” inquired my father.

A forlorn expression came over the boatman’s face while he said, “I have two children Saabji, a son of four years and a daughter of eleven years. We lived along the river bank. But now this river is my home.”

“How can the river be your home?” I interposed.

“Well my children are here and home is where family is...three years back I lost them to this river during the flood. I believe their souls rest in the river bottom. That is why I sing to them their favourite tales. You know how they say songs can travel far and long so I know my songs reach them. At night I sing them to sleep with the promise of a new morning. See the waves tugging at the boat? That is my children asking me to sing. Once I start singing they calm down.”

The poignancy of separation choked my voice. The boatman had already started singing to the waves and I pressed the record button on my phone to record the boatman’s song and his life in a single MP3 file.

Thank you all for reading this post. I am glad if you like this post. In life there should be some space for chances like anything happens about which we were not supposing and it just happens. Give some space in your life for this kind of chance. That's all about life.

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