Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts

Sunday, March 20, 2016

A Purposeful Life: Start a Fresh and Wonderful Beginning


For the past 8 months, I have been silently battling with, and drifting in and out of a state of depression. Perhaps it was the changing hormones in my prenatal and postnatal body, or perhaps it was life’s way of teaching me something new.

It has been a very painful process, but when I observe this period of my life from other perspectives, I realized that I am learning and relearning some of the most incredible lessons, through which I am able to recognize and change some old and very rigid behavior patterns and limiting beliefs.
This is a quick post to let you know that I am still alive, and that I am going through a tremendous period of healing, and that I am thinking about and writing the next full-fledged Think Simple Now style article, for you.

Last night, Ryan slept through the night for the first time since he was born, and I got 5-6 hours of continuous sleep, and I feel – for the first time in five months – like a human being again.
So hang in there, I am feeling better everyday, and I will be back very soon. Until then, here’s something that’s helped me in my own healing:

“In the infinity of life where I am, all is perfect whole, and complete, and yet life is ever changing. There is no beginning and no end, only a constant cycling and recycling of substance and experiences. Life is never stuck or static or stale for each moment is ever new and fresh. I am one with the very Power that created me, and this Power has given me the power to create my own circumstances. I rejoice in the knowledge that I have the power of my own mind to use in any way I choose. Every moment of life is a new beginning point as we move from the old. This moment is a new point of beginning for me right here and right now. All is well in my world.”
~ Louise Hay (You Can Heal Your Life)

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Tuesday, March 08, 2016

Everybody Wants A Great Beautiful Life: 21 Big Secrets



Who is in the driver’s seat of your life? Your job? Your family? The changing wind of life’s circumstances?
Ask yourself, “Is my life the way I want it to be?” If not, what is blocking you from jumping in the driver’s seat of your life?

Sometimes, it feels impossible to take control when you are stuck in a job you dislike because it pays the bills. Or when you can’t find a job. Or when you know your friends or family will reject you if you choose a different life path.
Life can sometimes be like a sticky spider web — the more you struggle against it, the more stuck you become.

Yes, life does have limitations, some of which are unchangeable. But a very large percentage of our lives is in our control — enough to profoundly impact how fulfilled and happy we feel on a daily basis.
Just knowing that you have some control is enough to change your perspective from hopeless to optimistic.

Creating The Life You Want

The very first step toward creating the life you want is to become a blank slate. Allow yourself to be open to some new ways of thinking, a different perspective. This may require you to shift some old beliefs or let go of your current “personal operating system“.
When you begin to make small shifts in your thinking, you open big doors for new ideas and opportunities.


21 Truths to Living the Life Your Want


1.  Understand that sustained happiness rarely comes from outside circumstances. Your wealth, beauty, power, or acquisitions have far less to do with happiness than your appreciation for what you have this very moment and your loving relationships with others.

2. You can live your life by design, but you must acknowledge your power in that, plan for it, and take the necessary actions.

3. You can’t have it all, but you can have enough to be very happy. Prioritise and focus on the top 3 or 4 most important areas of your life.

4. Stop focusing on what you don’t have or don’t like. Focus on what you do have and do like, and create a plan for what you think you can improve and change.

5. Abandon perfectionism. It is a useless pursuit with no end. It creates stress and unhappiness. Learn to find the balance point between good enough and peaceful living.

6. Put your own deepest needs first. If you are living for others before yourself and pushing your own needs aside, eventually you will crumble in some way — through depressionangeranxiety or destructive behaviours.

7. Your choices may disappoint or offend others. That is sometimes necessary in order to grow and live authentically. Those who love you and want the best for you will accept and support you.

8. Count your blessings. You probably already have many of the things you want for your life. Don’t take them for granted.

9. Address personal issues head-on. Don’t use these as an excuse for not having what you want in life. If you have a wound, a personality or relationship problem, or an anxiety, go to a counsellor and work on it. Resolve it. Weak people don’t go to counsellors, but strong forward-moving people do.

10. Pick one small problem or irritation and resolve it. Feel how much personal power and energy that gives you. Imagine how it would feel to resolve one of your bigger problems or concerns.

11. Consider disengaging from people who bring you down or drain your energy. Build relationships with people who are positive, action-oriented, and supportive.

12. Pick the one change that would make the biggest positive difference in your life. Begin visualising your life with this change implemented. Practise this regularly throughout the day.

13. Take this one step further and begin writing some specific action steps that might help make this change happen.

14. Strengthen your strengths. Make yourself indispensable in your area(s) of interest and expertise.

15. Always leave time for fun. Make fun happen in your life.

16. Don’t neglect your relationships. Don’t take them for granted. Find out what makes your loved ones happy, and do that for them.

17. Learn to let it go. Worry is the most fruitless expenditure of energy on the planet. Very little is worth worrying about. If you must do something, take action instead.

18. Don’t assume that you can’t do something. Prove that you can’t, and if so, try something else.

19. More often than not, your fear is the culprit for inaction.  More often than not, your fears are unfounded or at least out of proportion. More often than not, your fear will go away once you take action.

20. Focus on the task at hand. When you feel overwhelmed and pulled in many directions, just pick an important thing and do it without distraction. Then do another one.

21. Life is short. You have a limited number of days on this Earth. There isn’t time to waste your days in worry, anger or frustration. Make the most of this moment and the next and the next and the next . . .

If you want to have a wonderful life, spend your days in positive, forward-moving action and thought. Dismiss your longings for what you don’t have. Enjoy the actions as much or more than the outcomes.
The real secret to having the life you want is learning to love the life that you have.
. . . . . . . . . .

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Wednesday, January 27, 2016

Purposeful Life: Get a Wonderful Luck!



Have you ever wondered why some people seem so lucky?
There are numerous stories of actors who were discovered by being at the right place at the right time.

Then there are stories of those who were able to take a small loan or investment and turn it into an empire. Such stories are part of popular culture and give us hope. Yet at the same time, not many people seem to believe that they too can have good luck.

The notion of luck is something which has been part of human consciousness for a long time. I don’t know about you but I used to think that luck was handed out by some mystical being who just wielded their magic wand whenever they pleased. The way I saw it, lady luck was very fickle and very selective.

That all changed when I met the man who would become my husband. One day, we started to talk about luck and he simply told me that there was no such thing. To be candid, I thought he had lost his mind. However, despite my initial disbelief, I asked him to explain why he felt the way that he did.

He went on to tell me that people create their own destiny and that there is no need to wish people luck. He told me that events in life are not arbitrary but rather self created and realized.

What he said made sense on an instinctual level but I needed to further probe the issue. Sometimes we know things in our hearts but in order to fully grasp them, we need to experience them for ourselves. Thus began my journey to figure out luck.


Luck: Is it Destined or Created?


In my journey to understand luck, I read numerous books and articles that described the subject. Inevitably, the concept of fate and destiny came up which only seemed to confuse the issue.

Being that I am an enlightenment seeker, I do believe on some level in the concepts of fate and destiny. Yet I also believe that we have the power to overcome any situation. Nothing in life is set in stone (except for the fact that we will all pass away at some point). Free will is real and does exist. It is also a tool that we need to utilize fully. We all have the ability to rise above any situation if we want.

I have known people who were born into horrible circumstances only to rise above them and become successes in every way imaginable. In my own life, I have faced odds that seemed insurmountable but somehow I managed to overcome them. Did I consider that luck? No, I considered it a product of lots of hard work and determination.

“Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity.”
~ Seneca


So was luck destined or created? Both my mind and heart started to reach the conclusion that luck was self-created…but how? I decided to talk to some people who could easily be considered lucky.

The interesting thing is that in the ten conversations that I had on the subject of luck, one common theme emerged. All the people I interviewed (a world known doctor, artist, fashion designer, game designer, monk, surfer, writer, banker, home maker and web designer) told stories of how they were doing what they loved and somehow they were presented with numerous opportunities that enabled them to make their dreams come true.

It was then that I realized that the above-mentioned quote from Seneca describes the concept of luck beautifully and accurately. In order to be “lucky” one must master being not only prepared but ready to create and take advantage of opportunities. For when the two meet, luck becomes a reality.


Preparation

1. Study

Whatever it is that you are passionate about in life, study every aspect of it. Knowledge is power.
If you are passionate about art, study what goes into the making of a painting or a sculpture. Know the details about previous art periods and the various techniques. Study the lives of the artists that you admire. Learn about the paints, the kinds of canvases and all the tools involved in making a masterpiece. Basically, learn every single possible thing there is to know about art.

Expertise is not something you are born with…it is something that you earn and develop. Read books and listen to lectures on your area of passion. It doesn’t matter what your passion is…just master it. If you want to be the best mother there is in the world, then read up on the subject.


2. The 10,000 Hour Rule

The author Malcolm Gladwell in his book Outliers described the 10,000 Hour Rule as a reason why some people become successful. This rule is based on a study that was conducted by Anders Ericsson.

In this study, it was discovered that those who became successful in their given field had practiced it for a total of 10,000 hours prior to being discovered. In Gladwell’s book, he uses the example of the Beatles and how they practiced for 10,000 hours prior to becoming famous.

The point of this rule is that practice makes perfect. Or rather, practice helps turn luck from a concept into a reality.

Of course, this leads to the question: how can one person possibly practice for 10,000 hours? This is where the study factor becomes very important. Any time you are doing something that relates to your passion or whatever it is that you want to master, that time is counted towards your 10,000 hours.

Keep in mind, this does not mean that you need to document every single minute or second you spend on your passion or career or whatever. The number is not meant to set a rigid goal that needs to be met. Rather, it represents the concept of how important it is to master your subject.

Ten years ago, I realized and accepted the fact that my passion in life was to be a writer and I knew in my heart that my niche would be personal development and spiritual writing. The only problem was that I sucked as a writer and all my studies were just concepts at that time. I was not living my studies. All that I was reading were things that I admired and thought about but I was not putting them into practice.

I decided that in order to achieve my dream, I really needed to master my writing and know my subject thoroughly. So I spent the next ten years perfecting my writing and my knowledge. I worked at all kinds of jobs to support my desire for knowledge and travel. Every spare moment I had, I was reading or talking to someone who was doing what I wanted to do. I also began to apply the theories to my life and started living what I studied.

All that hard work paid off. Did I actually spend 10,000 hours? I have no clue. I still could be even better at my craft but I do know that I am much better now than I was then.


3. Visualize

Whatever it is that you want to experience in life, visualize it. See yourself doing whatever it is that you desire or want to achieve. If you want to be a successful artist, visualize what that would look and feel like. Imagine your work on the walls of a gallery. Carry yourself as if you already are a working artist who is not lacking in funds or commissions.

Years ago, I read a biography on the life of the singer Madonna. Many people recounted how when Madonna was just a club act, she handled every show as if it were a concert in a huge arena. The general conclusion was that she was acting like a superstar even before she became one.

Visualization is a tool that I use frequently because I have seen it work. Many times in my life, I visualized achieving certain goals or having certain funds. And every single time without fail, each item that I visualized became a reality. Sometimes it took hours and other times it took years.

The interesting thing about visualization is that it works with not only positive thoughts and images but with negative ones too. So take care of what you visualize.

One more thing in regard to the tool of visualization; it is important to keep in mind that it does not mean that you visualize while sitting back and doing nothing. You have to take some form of action too. Visualization without action will not yield results.


4. Surround Yourself With People Who You Wish To Be Like

The company you keep does have an impact on you. This does not mean that you get rid of all your friends and family. All this means is that you have people in your life who are not only like-minded but who are also doing what you wish to be doing.

Call it vibes or energy or whatever you wish; the people we spend time with do affect what we do and how we think and feel. Spend time with people who complain about life, inevitably you will start doing the same thing too.

Studies have proven this and I have seen it in my own life as well. When I spent time with people who lamented about their lack of success and lack of funds, I experienced those same things.

However, when I started to surround myself with positive people who were doing what I wished to be doing, I began to notice how my mindset of lack was being converted into a mindset of abundance. And you know what happened?

My awareness of my chosen career path began to expand and I began to notice all the possibilities that were out there. I also met an investor who willingly gave me the money to start my own business and I did not even have to write up a business plan.

Someone once said that you can tell a lot about a person by the company that they keep, so surround yourself with people who are living what you wish to achieve.


Meeting Opportunity

1. Be Kind To Every Single Person You Meet

We all have our off days. We all have days where it is hard to be compassionate and kind. However, you never know whom you will meet.

The person in line behind you at the supermarket may be an agent who can give you a record deal. The person who is sitting next to you on the subway may be the best friend you always wanted but never had. The guy serving you coffee may be your soulmate.

Every single second of every day we are surrounded by people. You never know whom you may meet at the gym or at the coffee house. Every single person you meet might be someone who has the power to change your life for the better.

In order for you to have your dream become a reality, you need someone to help you. We do not live in a vacuum. The concept of being self-dependent is an illusion because we need other people to buy our record or book or whatever.

The problem is that sometimes when we are out in the world, our focus is on ourselves and our thoughts usually are on what is happening in our lives. That kind of narrow-minded focus limits you from seeing your surroundings.

A guy dressed in sweatpants may seem like a nobody to you but for all you know, he may be the person that has the ability to help you achieve a certain goal.
In our society, we have a tendency to invest more in things than in people. Therefore, many tend to be impolite or totally unaware of others. Compassion and kindness go a long way. Being rude never does any good.


2. Be Confident and Excellent in Your Chosen Field

When you know your subject like the back of your hand, it is easy to be confident in your talents and skills.
This does not mean you have to be aggressive. Aggressiveness is a wasted emotion because it is a mask for insecurity. If you are good at what you do, there is no need to be insecure. Nor do you have to resort to backstabbing or pushy methods to get what you want. No one likes to be cheated or bullied.

When Charlie Rose asked Steve Martin about what advice would he give to others starting out in the acting business, Martin said the following: “Be so good at what you do that they cannot ignore you.
So if you want to be the next top game designer, then be confident at your coding and designing skills and just be as excellent as you can be. Someone will notice it and provide you with an opportunity. It may take time but it will happen.
Passion combined with hard work always -without fail- pay off and create so called “luck”.


3. Visualize Your “Lucky Break”

Again, the tool of visualization comes into play when creating an opportunity for luck to take place.
We all have dreams of how we would love to be discovered. Why not visualize that dream coming true?

About a year ago, I was working at a job that I did not love. I convinced myself that I loved what it gave me and that I could tolerate the gig until I was able to earn a living doing what I love.
This delusion lasted for some months but then I reached the point where I realized that I needed to quit because the job was creating so much stress which was affecting my health.

Shortly after, I was laid off from this soul-sucking job which then provided me with an opportunity to start a new career. Being that I was afraid and concerned about money, I started to look for another job but despite numerous interviews, nothing worked because my heart was just not in it.

For years, it has been my dream to have my own business. I have spent countless of hours visualizing what it would be like. I just never had the funds or it was not yet the right time. I simply hoped that someway and somehow it would happen.

I remember thinking it would be nice if life provided me with the money to fund my dreams of being self-employed. Then one day I was having coffee with someone who was living their dreams. We got to talking about my situation and one thing led to another and they offered to fund my new business.
They had no desire to see a business plan nor did they care if I paid them back. They saw the passion with which I spoke and that I knew every single detail of what I wanted to do.

I was able to rattle off figures of what it would cost and every other detail imaginable. Because of the fact that I was so prepared and enthusiastic, they wanted to be of help. Someone had helped them to become a success and they wanted to return the favor.

As you can see, my problem of being unemployed was solved simply because I was prepared when confronted with an opportunity.


Parting Words

One of the beautiful things about life is that we get out of it as much as we put into it. We all have our share of challenges and obstacles. No human being is immune from such incidents.

Success has no set definition. It means different things to different people. Someone who stays at home and does a beautiful job raising her/his kids is as successful as the person who runs a small company.

We each have the power to live a life that we love but it doesn’t happen by the simple fickle finger of fate. It is brought into fruition by the way you choose to engage in life. We all have the potential to be masters in whatever it is that makes our hearts sing.

We are the creators of our world and therefore, we are the creators of our so called luck.

* What do you think? Share your thoughts with us in the comment section below. See you there!

Share your thoughts and stories in the comment section. See you there! Before you go: please also share this story on Facebook, RT on Twitter . Follow us on Facebook and Twitter. Subscribe to receive email updates. Thank you for your support!

Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Wonderful 5 Steps for a Happy Life - Positive Attitude



We all want a happy life, and we all know that having a positive attitude feels better than a negative one. But for some reason, we are all attracted to and can be easily drawn to the negative side. How do we go about to establish a more positive attitude as a daily habit?

Even for someone like me, who thinks about and writes about positivity on an almost daily basis, having a positive attitude is not always easy.

I still sometimes see the world through a negative perspective, focusing on the bad and ignoring the good — especially when things aren’t going the way I had hoped. As I’ve been struggling with this lately, I’ve been reminding myself that it really is possible to change my perspective.

About a year and a half ago, I decided I was going to make a change in my life. I was going to start looking for the good, seeking the positive, and striving to make every day a joyful experience.

This was something I would have never imagined myself doing, but it’s something that has impacted my life every single day since then. I’ve had to do a lot to get to where I am right now, and I still believe I have a long way to go.

I’m not searching for any particular end point, however. All I want is to be happy, to live a life that focuses more on the good than the bad (though I do believe you need both to have a happy life).

On this road — this twisting, turning road to happiness — there have been many ups and downs. There have been challenges. There have been inspirations. There have been many amazing experiences that I never would have had if I had not made the choice to live a positive and happy life.
Recently, as I struggle to be positive about certain challenging situations in my life, I’ve been giving some serious thought to how I transformed my outlook from negative-focused to a more positive-focused one. (Note: I don’t always see the good. Like everyone, I have good days and bad days, but, for the most part, there has been a BIG shift in my attitude over the past year or so).

Though I have to admit that there are many, many factors involved in my personal development — such as my therapist, the countless books and blogs I read, creating my blog, and surrounding myself with happy, supportive people — I can say that, at the most basic level, choosing to be positive has helped me the most in terms of becoming the person I want to be.

When I think back on my transformation now, I recognize that the following five steps are the best ways to begin stumbling down that path to happiness by establishing a habit of positive attitude.


5 Steps to a Happy Life with Positive Attitude


Step 1: Believe Happiness is a Choice

For me, this was a hard one at first. I thought that people were either unhappy or happy (and I was one of the unhappy ones). I used to blame this on all kinds of outside forces –- fate, experiences, parents, relationships –- but never really stopped to think that I could choose to be happy.

Sure, this isn’t always easy, but it is always, always an option. Teaching myself to see that happiness is a choice has been one of the greatest things I’ve ever done for myself.

Now when I find myself in a bad situation, I know that it’s up to me to find the good, to be happy regardless of what’s happening around me. I am no longer pointing fingers, placing blame. I realize that everything happens how it happens and it’s up to me to choose how I want to feel about it. I am in control of my happiness level and no one can take that away from me.


Step 2: Rid Your Life of Negativity

If you want to live a positive, joyful and happy life, you cannot –- absolutely CANNOT -– be surrounded by negative people who are not encouraging your happiness. When I was a pretty negative person, I tended to attract other negative people.

When I decided to make the change to live a more positive life, I had to rid my life of all of the negative people in it. This, as you can imagine, wasn’t easy. Getting rid of people hurts -– even when you know they aren’t good for you or your current lifestyle.

Not only did I have to get rid of the negative people, but I also had to get rid of the negative things too. I had to stop doing certain things that were causing negativity in my life. I had to take a step back and examine which behaviors were good for me and which were not.

I learned to focus on the positive things I was doing and let go of the negative ones. This process was not easy and to be honest, is still ongoing, but I know this: having negativity in your life prevents you from living a truly positive existence.

Step 3: Look For the Positive in Life

There is the positive aspect in everything. In every person, in every situation, there is something good. Most of the time it’s not all that obvious. We have to look. And sometimes we have to look hard.

The old me just sat back and allowed things to happen by default. If I saw negative, I went with that feeling. I didn’t want to look harder or think too much about the good. I found it much, much easier to sit back and just accept what I saw (which was usually the bad).

Now, when I’m faced with a difficult or challenging situation, I think to myself, “What is good about this?” No matter how terrible the situation might seem, I always can find something good if I take the time to think about it.

Everything –- good and bad -– is a learning experience. So, at the very least, you can learn from bad experiences. However, there’s usually even more to it than that. If you really take the time to look, you will usually find something good, something really positive, about every person or situation.


Step 4: Reinforce Positivity in Yourself

Once I started thinking more positively and adapted to a more positive attitude, I realized I had to reinforce these thoughts and behaviors in myself so they would stick. As with any sort of training, practice makes perfect, and, yes, you can practice being positive.

The best and easiest way to do this is to be positive when it comes to who you are. Tell yourself you’re awesome. Tell yourself you look good. Tell yourself that you love and accept yourself completely. Tell yourself you did an awesome job at work or raising your kids or whatever it is you do.

Be honest with yourself, but do your best to look for the good. And, whatever you do, don’t focus on the negative. Nothing good can come of telling yourself that your butt’s too big or your latest career goal wasn’t met.

It’s okay to not like everything about yourself (yet), but don’t spend energy dwelling on the negative. Remind yourself of the good in you. We all have positive attributes and it’s up to you to remind yourself of them every day.


Step 5: Share Happiness with Others

Not only do you need to be positive with yourself for this new positive attitude to really take effect, you also need to be positive with others. You have to share your wealth of positivity with the world.
The best way I’ve found to do this is quite simple and basic: be nice. Be nice to other people, no matter what. Tell someone he or she looks nice today. Tell someone they did a great job on that presentation. Tell your parents or children (or both!) how much you love them and how great they are.

When someone is feeling down, do what you can to cheer him or her up. Send flowers. Write notes. Don’t gossip. Be kind to all living things. All of these things sound basic enough, but, for someone like me, they didn’t used to come easily.

In the past, I didn’t wanted to see the good in myself and, therefore, didn’t want to see it in others either. I used to be critical and condescending. Now I strive to be encouraging and supportive. I try not only to treat others, as I would like to be treated, but also to consider how they would like to be treated.

People appreciate positivity and the more you are sharing it with others, the more you are practicing it and reinforcing it in your own life.


Parting Words on the Positive Attitude Habit

When you start feeling like the idea of being a positive person is daunting, tell yourself this: “If someone who really used to struggle with a negative attitude, turned her life around with these five steps, then I can too!”

If anyone had told me a few years ago that I would be writing an article about developing a positive attitude and living a happy life, I would have laughed right in their face. I would have said, “Why in the world would someone want me to write about positivity?”


But here I am, writing this post, believing in these words, and knowing that every single day I am getting closer and closer to living the happy life I’ve secretly dreamed of living. If I can do it, you can do it. Believe in yourself and remember the most important lesson of all… a positive outlook is a choice. Choose to be positive. Choose to be happy. Life is short.


Share your thoughts and stories in the comment section. See you there! Before you go: please also share this story on Facebook, RT on Twitter . Follow us on Facebook and Twitter. Subscribe to receive email updates. Thank you for your support!

Thursday, December 03, 2015

An Art of Happiness: Wonderful and Joyful Life

Photo of Gala Darling by Chloe


One of the toughest challenges to being a new parent is the realization of how little free time you actually have.

During the first few weeks of Ryan’s arrival at home, my day would consist of diaper changes, feeding, burping, breast pumping, holding, rocking, shushing – and the cycle repeats itself until my husband comes home. On many days, finding time for a shower becomes a challenge in itself.

And if I’m lucky, when he’s napping, I’ll have an hour or two to run to the bathroom, wash all my breast pump parts and get something to eat. On my most productive days, my accomplishments include getting the dishes done, or a trip to the grocery store.

This has been my life for the past six months. And what I described above is only a small portion of the challenges we’ve face. Other challenges include sleep deprivation, maintaining romantic relationships, and colic (3+ hours of non-stop crying every evening for several weeks).

What I realized is that we as a society really don’t give enough credit to the fulltime moms and dads in the world. It is really one of the toughest things one could experience, yet, it is one of those things we can’t anticipate or truly understand until we’re going through it.

Because my hands are constantly full (literally), I am behind on everything else, like cleaning the house, doing laundry, answering email and what feels like an endless list of action items.

Now that Ryan is a little bit older, whenever he is not eating or napping, I find myself putting him down on a playmat or swing, almost habitually, so I can catch up and get more things done. But in doing so, I wasn’t really participating with him when he was awake.

ryan-5months.jpg
Ryan at 5 months. See more photos on facebook.

My mind felt noisy, cluttered and frazzled. I felt as if I was drowning in a sea of todos… ahhhh!!!!!!
One day a few weeks ago, as I was rushing to getting some work done on the computer, I heard Ryan making these ridiculously adorable sounds with his mouth as he lay on a blanket next to my desk.

I tried to ignore it, so I could finish what I was doing, but then in that moment, I realized that I was missing out on being with my baby and witnessing the precious developmental moments. I turned off the computer and started playing with Ryan with all my attention.

I realized that I had allowed the list of action items to dictate how I was living my life. I became so focused on getting things done, that I was no longer focused on being with my baby son, even though he is with me physically.

I realized that work will always be there, and that it is never ending if I allow it to be. I realized that my own happiness and spending time being with my family are the most important priorities. And now, I choose to be with my son, to give him my full attention, to witness the pure bliss that babies radiate. Everything else can wait.

It’s like when we’re busy being busy, we miss the beautiful details of our life, and we take for granted the things that mean the most to us.

If today was the last day of your life, would you be doing what you’ve been so busy trying to get done? Or would you be spending deliciously intimate time with the people you loved? Or doing something so satisfying for your soul that you know in your heart that life was meant to be joyful.


The Direct Route to Happiness


It’s easy to get caught up with the never ending todo lists, or the demands of other people wanting your time, or the guilt of things you think you “should” be doing.
But if we take a moment to slow down, to reflect, to clear our minds, we will realize that many of the things we do, and many of the things that seemingly cause us stress do not add any value to our wellbeing.

At the end of the day, ask yourself, “What do I want?” and the answer is likely a derivative of “I want to be happy.
So instead of being busy, instead of doing, instead of rushing to get there, just decide to be happy, right Now!
Make the feeling of Joy and Happiness your primary focus as you walk through your day, regardless of what you are doing.

Focus on things that make you feel good. Focus on the goodness and blessings in your life. Look for things to be appreciative of, and mentally point out all that you are thankful for in any moment.

If you catch yourself feeling stressed out or overwhelmed, stop what you are doing and (optionally) close your eyes. Take a few deep breathes – fully inhale and slowly exhale – and ask yourself, “I want to feel good. What can I do right now to feel good?” and focus on feeling good and follow your inner voice.

The other day, I felt distracted and pressured, and then I asked myself what I wanted to do at that moment, and my inner voice said to play the song Sweet Lullaby by Deep Forest. For me, the song represents hope, inspiration and adventure.

I instantly felt upbeat and started dancing to its tunes in my office. A sense of relief washed over me physically and calmed my emotional being. I felt refreshed right away. In that moment, I came away with the following realization:

Stop doing what you think you should be doing.

Do what you want to do, do what makes you feel good,

do what you feel inspired to do.
Remember that in your world, you make up the rules.
Stress is optional.

Tina Su

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